April 23, 2008 - Last Entry as a Missionary

Hello Everyone - for the last time,

I will leave Selenge on the evening of April 27th on the night train, which usually goes at about 9:05 at night. I will be by myself in a private 4-person compartment, and then hopefully someone will come to the train station in UB and pick me up on Monday morning at 7:15 because I don't think I could emotionally handle going from the train station to the church building by myself. I will be staying in the MTC housing there with all the other missionaries getting off their missions. There are twenty of us altogether! For a few days we will wrap things up, plan our farewell fireside, have some "How to become a normal person again" training taught by the senior couples, and do other things. I'm hoping that I will have time to visit some of the people I want to see during these few days.

What to write for the last blog? Sorry, I haven't been writing very regularly lately. It is hard to describe my feelings at this point. On the one hand, I am so grateful for the time I have had here and I have no regrets. On the other hand I just think it's the most horrible and unjust thing in the world that I have to leave this place!

We had our last zone conference in Darkhan on Monday and I had to bear my final testimony (one of the 500 "final" testimonies I've been giving in Sacrament meetings and district meetings lately). I told my fellow missionaries that for me serving a mission was everything but a sacrifice. I feel like the whole time was just given to me to learn about myself and the gospel and about people and life. When I look back I don't even know the pre-mission Cheryl because she didn't know a thing about Mongolia.

I've learned so much. I hope I've become a better person. I know I've also figured out a lot of my faults that I will have to keep working on when I get back. Most importantly what I have gotten from my mission is an indescribably firm conviction of the truthfulness of the gospel that will be with me for the rest of my life and into the eternities. It really is true! And as Elder Thueson says, its truthfulness is only as important as the amount you are able to take it in and apply it is your life.

If it really is true, you are going to live it, breathe it, study it and try to live up to it for the rest of your life. It is so much more a part of me now than it was before I left. I know that it is true with every fiber of my being. I know that there is a God, so I pray to him. I know that he hears and answers our prayers, so I search and ponder and then offer up the desires of my heart. I know He loves me, so I seek to follow His commandments. I know His Son, Jesus Christ, is our Savior, so I seek to rely on Him and get rid of those things in my life that are not in accordance with His will. I say this in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

I think at this point the only way to truly express the way I feel is in picture form:

FYI Sister Johnson's release date is Thursday, May 1. Her parents and brothers, Brad and Greg, will be there to greet her. They will spend a week in Mongolia and then take the train across the Gobi desert to Beijing. After a week there, they will all return to Washington, DC--May 14.